Pakistan's clean text drive

Officials in Pakistan are demanding that mobile phone operators block all text messages that include words they define as being "offensive" . The Pakistan Telecommunications Authority has produced a list of more than 1,000 swearwords, anatomical terms and other phrases judged likely to be used obscenely. The usual, unrepeatable, suspects are there, but so are a number of seemingly innocuous words, the inclusion of which has baffled some observers, including the following: Axing the weasel Backdoor Banging Budweiser Deposit Dome Finger food Floggin the dolphin Footstar G-Unit Got Jesus Hobo Kumquat Hole Idiot Joint Lotion Pud Satan Sleezebag Stringer Tongue Trojan Trots It's possible, then, to envisage a number of entirely innocent messages that might provoke the ire of Pakistan's censors. We'd like you – without too much swearing if you don't mind – to have a go at you imagining some of them.