What makes men cry?

1 Toy Story 3, now dubbed by every reviewer on the planet THE FILM THAT MAKES MEN CRY. It's not just a stupid movie, it's a stupid movie that reminds us of growing up. Or something. Just shut up and lend us a hankie. 2 Cinema prices. If we have to pay a tenner for a seat, we should be able to keep it. 3 The state of the Gents. Why do you think we sneak into the Ladies? 4 The fact that we're all going to die. 5 The fact that blokes will die sooner. 6 Football, if you are English. 7 Women who assume we have no feelings. 8 Women who ask us about our feelings. 9 Man boobs. Look us in the eye when you talk to us, not our chest. 10 Not owning an iPhone. 11 Owning an iPhone and trying to use it. 12 Childbirth. It's hell not being able to help. 13 Children. It's hell having them around the house. 14 Opera, if we're paying for the tickets. 15 The whole internet knowing we've got a small penis. You should see the emails we get. 16 Still catching it in the zip. 17 Putting on our jeans, if we're Jeremy Clarkson. 18 Speedos. Full stop. 19 Failure to recognise our genius. 20 Self-pity, not that we're prone to it.